...it didnt take much work for 2 county sheriffs' deputies to track down 4 burglary suspects.  The suspects pulled into the Happy Chef's restaurant, where the deputies were on coffee break.  The deputies became suspicious when the 4 men ordered the "All-You-Can-Eat-Bread & Water" Special. 

You have to admire Kanye West! He is the first black rapper to screw a young white girl then call her the next day to apologize! 

Wow, You can buy a "Politician Action figure"!.... It must be marketed to Oxymorons...

The 72 year run of the soap opera "Guiding Light" is coming to a close this Friday.

Writers have disclosed the reason for the shows ending was because everyone has slept with everyone else.

 Have you noticed the differences between Jay Leno's New Show vs his Old Show???     It SUCKS 1 1/2 hours earlier...So now I get to fall asleep at 10:05pm eastern!

 I just saw an internet post that ask.."How many SEXUAL OFFENDERS are in your neighborhood?" ......Well, I don't know....but i do know... there is one sexual DEFENDER in my bed!

Former House Majority Leader Tom DeLay was injured while rehearsing for ABC's "Dancing With the Stars."

Apparently, he can only do the two-step after an indictment.

It's official! Last night's MTV Video Music Awards will be renamed "When Rappers behave like Congressmen"

Only you can prevent forest fires.*

*=Offer not valid in California.

I think my perception of women has been horribly skewed by watching too much porn. So to balance things out, I'm now masturbating to videos of couples dating.