I don't care what Rush Limbaugh says, I don't want Jimmy Fallon to fail!

Disgraced Wall Street investment banker Bernie Madoff has inked a deal with director Steven Spielberg for an upcoming tell-all movie exposing all the people Madoff has ripped off.

The film's tentative title...."Swindler's List"

My local newspaper is now publishing online.  I'm potty training my puppy and he's already ruined three computers.

61-year-old Stephen Bernard died on March 7 at Cape Cod Hospital. A quite funeral service was held on March 11. However, there seemed to be some confusion during the service as pallbearers complained that the coffin did not feel full. A spokesperson for the family quickly explained that, “If it does not appear full it is because contents have settled during shipping and handling”

Sarah Palin said she could see it coming from a mile away.

In an interview last month , Sarah Palin described Bristol's fiance as a "hands-on" dad.  If Internet rumors are to be believed, he now has his hands on another woman.

What's the difference between Barack Obama and Jesus?

At least Jesus could put together a cabinet.

Pacers owner Herb Simon is considering moving his team out of Indianapolis. That way they can find another city to disgrace.

A Missouri family is building a home inside a cave.   "It's so easy!", they said,  "Even Gieco could do it!"

...singer Glen Campbell was arrested in Germany for being under the influence of alcohol & drugs.............like a Rhine-stoned cowboy. 

Anna Nicole Smith's boyfriend Howard K. Stern and two doctors were charged with giving thousands of prescription drugs to the former Playboy Playmate.   Yesterday Rush Limbaugh posted bond for Stern and hired him as his housekeeper.

President Obama called for tying teachers' pay to students' performance, embracing an idea that has provoked hostility from members of teachers unions.  Said one union member, "I think President Obama's pay should be tied to the performance of the economy."