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Joke List: Highest Rated (From Week Starting Feb 11, 2007)
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 NASCAR officials suspended members of driver Michael Waltrip's crew team for cheating, after jet fuel was found in Waltrip's vehicle. Although Waltrip's crew team denied the charges, NASCAR officials are still suspicious since this was his vehicle...
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In her Good Morning America interview with Iranian President Ahmadinejad on Monday, Diane Sawyer put on the requisite headdress.
I must say, those things can be quite flattering. Check her out:
And since it's good to be prepared, here's me:
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 Former Miami Heat guard Tim Hardaway said yesterday on a radio show that he would not want to play on a team with a gay teammate.
Ironically, Tim is about to learn a lesson about bigotry, losing endorsement contracts, and adoring fans the Hard-a-way.
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U.S. Army Brigadier General Patrick Finnegan, the dean of the United States Military Academy at West Point, asked the creative team of the TV show "24" to stop showing that torture works on the show.
Because despite the fact that there is near-universal agreement among those knowledgeable on the subject that torture does not work in reality, the show makes people (even trained military operatives) believe that it does, and makes them want to try what they see on the show.
Students at West Point, told the facts by their knowledgeable teachers, have sincerely asked things like, "If torture doesn't really work, why does it work for Jack Bauer?"
To which I say, if teleportation doesn't really exist, how did they beam people up and down on "Star Trek"? Way back in the 1960's, no less?
IT'S A FICTIONAL TELEVISION SHOW.
Why are military students putting more stock in make-believe than in facts taught by experienced, real-life teachers?
But people say, "Still, if there's a nuclear bomb about to go off in New York City, what if the only way to keep it from going off is to torture someone?"
To which I say, there's another option. Simply beam the bomb up into space, far enough away that it won't hurt anyone.
Or perhaps give Superman a call and have him fly it into the sun.
Or click your heels together and say "There's no place like home" and wake up in your bed back in Kansas.
There are so many options for dealing with the threat of terrorism.
But I guess changing television DOES make the most sense.
Hopefully it will at least stop the torture of my having to hear any more about this.
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Copyright 2006-2008 © International Mining and Steel, Inc.
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Next Week
When you go three months without a bath, it's important to check for odor.
"Nothing up my sleeves, not even an exit strategy."
Doctors say the rest of his head may be malignant
