Cincinnati Bengal Chad Johnson had to wear a jersey with Johnson on it rather than his new name "Ocho Cinco." Johnson was disappointed, not because the jersey still said "Johnson," but because it still said "Bengals".

"Vice-President nominee Sarah Palin, a former sportscaster, shows off her stellar play-by-play skills in this 1988 video. Watch how Sara illustrates her strong, opinionated remarks when she advises then-Los Angeles Dodgers baseball manager Tommy Lasorda to learn how to relax. Maybe Bob Costas should become Secretary of Defense?"

Titans quarterback Vince Young wandered away from home after being booed at Sunday's game.  Friends said he was terribly upset - because he had Tom Brady on his fantasy team.

Tom Brady has said that he stills likes the Patriots chances despite his season-ending injury. Upon hearing his pronouncement, doctors immediately lessened his dosage of morphine.

The Romantic Comedy. More about the new star of the Republican Party, Sarah Palin. What's up with barely mentioning George Bush?  There may be some George Bush themes in McCain's Acceptance Speech.

It was reported that during the GOP convention, to prevent Sarah Palin from pronouncing "nuclear" as "new-cu-lur," like President Bush does, the teleprompter during her speech spelled the word out phonetically.  When he heard the news, Bush was proud, saying that it's innovation like this that makes the terrorists hate us so much. 

Los Angeles based retailer the 99 Cent Store plans to break their 26 year-old pledge of "Nothing Over 99 Cents, Ever" and raise prices above the $1.00 mark. According to company officials, "Thanks to a sluggish economy, the only thing worth less than a dollar is the dollar." 

www.jerrywolski.com

Our government is having a tough time finding Osama Bin Laden; only because the Muslim Religion doesn’t allow tombstones.

...utah police say actor gary coleman hit a man with his pickup after an arguement at a bowling alley...after getting out of his truck, coleman continued beating the man with one of the dozen Los Angeles phone books he was sitting on to see over the dashboard. 

New Detroit running back Rudi Johnson claims former Detroit running back Tatum Bell stole two of his bags. Johnson fits right in with the Lions - he's already experienced a loss.

Tom Brady suffered a knee injury and may be out for the year. Bill Belichick will replace him with tapes of a healthy Brady.