Seattle Seahawk Matt Hasselbeck revealed that he played eight games with broken fingers. Even sadder are the three games Tony Romo played with a broken heart.

Dallas Cowboy Terrell Owens is denying that his recent trip to the hospital was a suicide attempt saying he couldn’t possibly find time to kill himself when he’s too busy killing Dallas’ season.

Hours after the release of a police report saying he tried to kill himself by overdosing on pain medication, Dallas Cowboys receiver Terrell Owens flashed a thumbs-up as he left the hospital.

After six to seven cars passed him, one finally pulled over. It was then realized that the friendless T.O. was not giving a positive gesture, but hitchhiking.

Jessica Simpson has a new fragrance that she claims is inspired by boyfriend Tony Romo. The fragrance starts out smelling great but fades quickly.

DALLAS (July 16) - Dallas Cowboys safety and top special teams player Keith Davis was shot twice while driving early Sunday. Davis was hospitalized in stable condition after undergoing surgery to remove bullet fragments.

This is the second time in three years that Davis has been shot. In June 2003, Davis was shot in the hip and elbow while picking up a friend at a topless club.

"The thing that's really pertinent here is that Keith was not involved in any type of criminal activity or anything like that," his agent said. "This is not the residual effect of that."

The Cowboys managed to beat the Packers 27-16 for their very first win at Lambeau Field. You know something has gone horribly awry when Hell is frozen over and Lambeau Field isn't.

Terrell Owens denies claims that he attempted suicide saying, "Man, that didn't happen."

Dallas wide receiver, Terrell Owens, got into another fight, this time with Cowboys positions coach, Todd Haley. Dallas coaches are starting to long for the old days, when their receivers just did coke like they were supposed to.

The good news - Terrell Owens is just one bus accident away from his own episode of Behind the Music.

DALLAS (July 16) - Dallas Cowboys safety and top special teams player Keith Davis was shot twice while driving early Sunday. Davis was hospitalized in stable condition after undergoing surgery to remove bullet fragments.

This is the second time in three years that Davis has been shot. In June 2003, Davis was shot in the hip and elbow while picking up a friend at a topless club.

"The thing that's really pertinent here is that Keith was not involved in any type of criminal activity or anything like that," his agent said. "This is not the residual effect of that."

Earlier this summer, Dallas gave him a roughly $3 million, two-year contract that includes about $2 million in bonuses and salary this season.

Dear Keith's agent,

Totally with you dude. Keith is totally innocent. Yeah, when I go for a drive at 5 a.m., a highway with four cars on it frequently seems like The OK Corral! I get shot like every other day. Hey, those are the pitfalls of living in Iraq. By the way, everyone knows that “friends” don’t let topless friends drive drunk. I’m sure Keith was just on the way to an early Mass at church and was helping out a fellow congregant who just strayed from the straight and narrow (and clothes).

Come on, would the Dallas Cowboys or any other sports organization support criminal activity from a player? Please, I'm good friends with Barry Bonds and O.J. Simpson and let me tell you, their teams, fans, and family (the living ones) love them. Do you know why? Because they are the nicest, most ethical and law-abiding citizens you will ever meet.

By the way, don’t worry, I’m sure if Keith misses training Bill Parcells, who is extremely understanding of freak occurrences, excuses, and run-ins with the law, will let Keith keep his job and signing bonus.

Best wishes,

Pinocchio